Thursday, February 15, 2018

bits

Esme was a bit upset this morning about how the other kids are at school - as in, they don't seem to care or try as much as she does on some things, and when she tries to help or point things out of course they don't appreciate it.  They gave her a nickname she doesn't like - it isn't terrible, but yes she doesn't like it.  I explained to her that both of her parents have been through this, it is part of our personalities that we really can't just 'blend in' and be like everyone else and we never really wanted to, either  - well, not really.. but I get where she is coming from that it hurts to not be like them but it would hurt to be LIKE them, too..

I get some of this pedanticness and process-following and overanalyzing from my dad.  I asked that question of my stepmom a few days ago and she told me that is his 'Modus Operandi'... he analyzes and decides the best way for him to do something (that sometimes is off the wall compared to the usual person's method) and then he does it that way even if it exasperates someone else.  But, he gets it done.  Like my stitching something by hand, or digging the garden with a hand trowel and watering with a bucket.  It might not be the most efficient 'normal' way to do something but it feels best to US so we do it the most 'comfortable' way for us, which has nothing to do sometimes with actual comfort - but with mental processes and 'fit'.

Esme and I did discuss some tactful ways to point out things to her classmates (like not setting your ipad on the floor in front of your locker where it could get stepped on in the meantime, which one girl does and it gives Esme anxiety but the girl does not appreciate being told so) or keeping some things to yourself because you know how you feel about it but maybe the other person just has to learn for themselves if they aren't the type to listen (oh, so often at work, this one).

Mark and I have this trait in common and in opposite - we point things out to each other and if we feel that the added clarity is helpful, we will do it that way, but if it still makes sense to do what we are doing the way we are doing it, we will continue on.  It is nice that we rarely actually argue about things unless they are huge, and that we also often see that 'clarity' in what the other person sees at the moment, and will be 'expanded' by their observations into doing something more accurately, efficiently or with less effort.  It is an amazing quality - kind of like my eating his green Skittles.  *heh* because otherwise he would just throw them out and I actually like lime flavored things where he would go out of his way to avoid them.  Like that 'Same' yet opposite, complementary colors.

I'm on to reading 'Spindlers' today. by Lauren Oliver.


 Just before she realized I had the camera.  Sweetie is consoling Lucy because Esme is at school and she is sad.  And, Sweetie kind of likes her anyway, its nice to have a puppy. (Actually Sweetie is Lucy's aunt)


And an attempt at dignity after I have the camera *heh*


Esme and I have been building this house in Minecraft - it is really fancy and tall :)

1 comment:

Tanza Erlambang said...

great posting.
God bless you