What to do about my mom

My mom can't afford to pay her own bills for electricity, medicine, food, phone bill etc... and yet she sent me a birthday present. I told her not to.

I don't need anything and I definitely don't need something expensive she can't afford - that I can't even send back. She lives in far Northern Minnesota in a very small town (I grew up there) - and shipping from there to here is expensive as well. Even if I try to distract her by asking for something small she ends up sending something big which I didn't need. GROWL - I don't know what to do about this - she did it at Christmas too (well actually in January) and then she lost her phone service from nonpayment a few months later. Any suggestions? How do you get someone to understand that it makes you only worry more in this situation? I'm not my sister - who loves to beg her for lots of stuff, money etc etc.... and whines when Mom doesn't send anything to her. How do I get through to her that this is NOT what I want her to do?

I was already planning on sending them some handmade things for Lizzie (my brother's daughter) and household type stuff. My Mom loves it when I send her handmade things but I don't do it often anymore with my limited time. I'm worried that sending them a box will just encourage her on sending me stuff -- does that sound funny? I used to do that - pile up things to send them 'someday' and then send them in one box. But that just led to her spending more money because she doesn't make things anymore -- not the reaction I wanted. Even worse they're not 'me' things - I'm a crafty tomboy. These things are more slated towards my sister or what my mother likes for herself. Even if she gathered some fabric or Esme-size clothes at a thrift store (which I've reccommended) it would be better!

/End gripe -- I know I shouldn't complain at all. She is being generous and motherly - but I'd much rather know she has her phone and her medicine and something to fall back on. A card or a letter is more than enough. *sigh*